Single mothers make up a significant portion of the dating pool; in fact, households with single moms rank second in commonality among family types in Nigeria. Dating a single mother can be a rewarding and unique experience, providing an individual with the opportunity to get to know a strong woman and connect with her little ones. Along with these positives, however, dating a single parent can also present complications that some people aren’t prepared to take on. Whether it’s because of a potential lack of time or a choice to never have children, there are several concerns that may cause someone to avoid dating a single parent. Below, we’re going to discuss six such reasons people do not date single mothers.

Feeling intimidated
It’s common for some people to be nervous around single moms. It takes a lot of drive, energy, love, and dedication to run a household, after all. People might see all that the single mother gets done in a day, admire their strength and power, and feel intimidated. Most single parents have grown accustomed to getting things done on their own. It doesn’t mean they don’t want help, only that they’ve gotten used to being independent. 

Involvement of the ex-partner 
Single parents have varying levels of involvement with the person they had children with. In some cases, there will be no contact. In other cases, the mother and kids might see the other parent almost daily. A potential romantic interest might worry about uncomfortable encounters with the ex-partner. This can be a complicated dynamic to navigate—which could include conflict with the ex and tension surrounding interactions with the children—so it is one that not everyone is willing to incorporate into their lives. 

Potential lack of spontaneity 
Some people desire a less structured life and are aware that a single parent might not be quite as flexible with their time. Scheduling dates with romantic partners may require additional planning for single mothers. For example, if you’re someone who likes to extend dates when they’re going well, this might not be a possibility for a single mother, who may have time constraints she has to adhere to. If you are someone who likes to change plans at the last minute or prefers not to plan at all, you and a single parent may not be as compatible.   

Wanting a less serious relationship
Some single moms—though by no means all single moms—may be hesitant to enter into a partnership that isn’t committed or exclusive. They may want to avoid spending time on a casual relationship, or they might want to find someone who will act as a parent figure for their children. So, someone who is looking for a less serious type of relationship may want to avoid wasting a single mother’s time. If you aren’t looking for a serious relationship, but a single mother is, it likely isn’t a compatible match, and that’s okay.

Having kids of one’s own
It may seem counterintuitive, but some single parents are hesitant to date other single parents. They may be worried that the parenting styles won’t match or apprehensive regarding the compatibility of the children. Some people may be concerned that, between their obligations and their partner’s, they won’t be able to spend enough time with a single mother. While many single parents start successful relationships, this it can be a challenging situation for some.

Apprehension about bonding with the kids 
Some people might worry about getting attached to a child, but then not being in their life if the relationship with their mother ends. This situation can be hard for both the partner and the children, who may have already experienced several changes regarding parent figure. If you tend to get attached to children, you might not want to enter into a relationship with a single mother unless you know it is going to be long term.